The Battle between Consistency and Perfection

In the journey to lose weight and adopt better lifestyle habits, perfection is NOT the goal. Consistency, however, IS the means and the end.


In working with one of my patients this week, I noticed that she was apologizing throughout our session. We were reviewing her food journal, and every time we came across a food she deemed "unacceptable" she apologized for "messing up" or making a "mistake." This is not an uncommon experience—patients tend to approach weight loss as if there are hard and fast rules that can't be violated. In the worst form, people give up after breaking these rules or "cheating" as most people call it. They find that they can't get back on track because they only anticipate that they will find themselves breaking the rules again very shortly.


The All or None way of thinking can dominate your approach to healthy lifestyle behaviors, and when you're on track, you feel invincible and incredibly focused. However, when you're off track, you're a train wreck full of despair. The All or None approach may be helping you in some aspects of your life. For example, you may be able to block out distractions and have laser-like focus on work projects. This can lead to you being incredibly successful and accomplished, but it won't help you when you're trying to modify your lifestyle.

Sometimes, you may miss the mark. Just keep aiming in the right direction

Why can't this approach work? Healthy living and losing weight is not governed by some set of rules and regulations. Despite what some people may have you believe, there are many effective strategies to achieving a healthy lifestyle and weight. You have to find a way of doing things that works for you, based on your situations and unique challenges. As you develop this approach, your goal is to implement it consistently. You also have to take ownership of the actions and choices you make using a framework other than "cheating." You're not cheating anyone if you eat the chimichanga and your original intent was to get the grilled fish. That was a choice you made, and you should own it. When you own it, you have to then understand why you made the choice and how you can make other choices that are consistent with your goals the next time.


Liberate yourself from the unattainable goal of perfection and go for consistency. See how much easier that feels already!